"SO SO GRATEFUL"

You know that moment where you look back on a tough section of your life and you think "that wasn't so bad"? Obviously the whole recommenders have bailed thing thwt just happened isnt the worst thing to have to me but now that it is over with I couldn't be more grateful. I honestly haven't had this good of a day in a while and it is all because Dr. Sullivan, Dr. Licht, and my lab supervisor have all come through with letters of recommendation for me. The amount of times I used the words 'grateful' and 'thank you' today in my various emails just baffles me. I do however mean each and every one. I could not be more grateful to these three individuals and I don't think I will ever be able to express it in the right way.

Today also saw me decide to keep my spring admission plan. If I was able to get all of this done in a week so I am going to interpret this as a sign that I am meant to attend a graduate program in spring. Now to just prepare my bank account and my self for another culture shock. 

I Should've Said

Assuming that everyone has something they look back on and wish they had done differently isn't a far fetched idea in my opinion. I personally have a laundry list of things I wish had panned out differently based on how I wish I had responded. More specifically, I have a list of occurrences where I wish I had spoken differently.

You know when you get into little spats with people and they turn into (sometimes) playful insult battles where the whole point is to come up with the best come-back? Think MTV's "Yo Momma." Now that we're all on the same page, you know that time after the come-back war is over and you think of all of the perfect little insults/sly sayings you could have said? That is essentially what I'm talking about when I say I have a lot of occurrences where I wish I had spoken differently.

My favorite least favorite past time is rehashing conversations and beating my self up over all the stupid things I said versus all the things I've come up with instead. Or when I don't say anything at and then hate myself for not telling someone like it is. For example, I have this friend who makes me want to shoot myself most times we talk. Do I tell this friend this? No. This friend would freak out and call me mean. Doesn't mean I don't want to tell this friend that they drive me insane. 

The whole point of this massive post is that I've realized there are things I never said to people I met in college that I'll probably never get to say. This really bothers me. I was never brave enough to just come out and say certain things to certain people and I dislike this about myself. How many time's has this happened before? What else have I not said? 

Three of Three

**THIS WAS ON TIME BUT THE BLOGGER APP DIDN'T POST IT**

Today my third and final graduation occurred and it means that I'm done with my undergraduate career. Done. Finished. 

Apparently this is a big deal. I'm not the first in my entire, extended family to get a college degree. However, I am the first in my immediate family. My mother didn't finish high school from what I know about her and I know my dad didn't go to college. My sister pursued other dreams. My dream from a young age was to pursue an education. I was primed to want to be the first one to graduate from college. I was constantly told to be and pushed toward being a successful, independent woman.

I accomplished obtaining my college degree today. I obtained my Bachelor of Science in Psychology and Family and Child Sciences and now the next step ia graduate school. 

Oh bou

Racing the Clock

I'm racing clock in many different aspects of life. Lets count down shall we? 

I have:

- 9 days until I take the G.R.E.

-12 day until I say goodbye to my sorority 

- 20 days until graduation

- 22 days until I move back home

- 51 days until Hunter Hayes

- 263 days until I finish my blog.

Okay, the last one is a stretch but I figured I'd throw it in there. These next three weeks are going to be intense and what made me realize how quickly this has all gone by were some of the conversations I had with family members I talked to today. They all told me how proud they were to see me get to where I am today. Some of them are even experiencing achievements of their own (SO EXTREMELY PROUD OF THOSE BY THE WAY!!) and I don't want to miss out on anything. 

You have all the time you give yourself. I need to start using mine wisely.

Auditions and Anxiety

And alliteration it seems. Just kidding.

So today saw Brandi and I auditioning for the talent show. I think it went fairly well however, we still have to hear back as to whether or not we will be allowed to perform. I really hope that we are. We have worked so hard on this and the last half of the dance is so dynamic. Positive vibes. Positive vibes. 

Before the audition, I made it to my 9am class as a full day of work. This full day of work was spent playing Facebook games and trying to do better on my G.R.E. scores. I took a practice test yesterday and I was able to bring up my verbal score from to 65th percentile. That is more than enough for admission into one of my grad schools but in order to get in to the other I need to raise my math score way WAY up. My current score is in the 16th percentile and definitely needs some assistance. The more I think about this test the more anxious I get. I have 28 days to bring up this score or I can all but  kiss my graduate school dreams goodbye. 

In other news, I am only one hundred dollars away from my goal for Dance Marathon and I have 4 days to raise it!!! Wooooo!!!

Final Two Months

As a sister and I entered our college town this afternoon, we were greeted with rain, puddles, humidity, and general icky-ness. It's like Mother Nature knew we were all sad that spring break was over and wanted to cry with us. She's still crying mind you. Of course maybe Mother Nature is sad that she will be losing so many students from this area soon. Or maybe the clouds were just really full of evaporated water. 

Regardless of why the sky is pouring buckets of water on our heads, today is kind of a big deal. Today marks my last two months in my apartment near campus. It marks about 40 days until graduation. It marks the end. Three years ago I was in the middle of preparing for IB and AP exams and I was about to accept my acceptance at my university. Now it's almost over. I'm preparing for the GRE, looking at other schools, thinking about jobs back home. It's a whole new ball game and I'm not sure I'm ready. I've been on the cusp of adulthood since I was twelve and now you're telling me its actually time? My nearly 10 years of waiting is almost over? What?

I always knew that I would have a hard time transitioning to a life outside of school. I had that realization in fifth grade when they asked us to put together a portfolio of what we wanted our lives to be. We had to come up with a title for each "chapter" of our lives and while the only title I remember is "UT is for Me" I distinctly remember asking my self: "What is it going to be like when we're done with school? What do we do then?" Then I panicked, starting planing ways to stay in elementary school forever, and tried to come up with a way to freeze time.

In all seriousness, I still haven't quite figured out what's next. I know where I want to go in life, how I want to help others and be successful but I don't know about June. I go home and work on saving as much as possible and helping my sister. We'll see. 

SIDENOTE: I'VE RAISED 207 FOR DANCE MARATHON!!! THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAS HELPED SO FAR!!

All New Things

Today was a pretty bland day in the grand scheme of things. It was full of new things both physical and experiential.

My nephew would not let go of me today. He would not stop wanting to play or cuddle or giggle or anything. He's always loved to climb on me but this level is new. It's adorable and I love it but its new and it will take some getting used to.

I bought Catching Fire because I didn't have a reason not to. I bought a bunch of new bras (TMI? EH you'll be fine) which is honestly the best thing I've bought in a while. There was a new episode of Teen Wolf, I was able to finalize my plans for another concert I want to go to, and now I have a sore throat. Joy. I think that sums it up. New Things. Yay.

Away From School

"Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to work we go" - the Seven Dwarves- Snow White and the Seven Dwarves

Today was the first day of my last undergraduate spring break. What did I do? I had a road trip back home with one of my sisters, cuddled with one of my nephews, went to work (WORK IS A MAGICAL PLACE WHERE YOU SING DISNEY SONGS ALL DAY) and now I'm home.

I already love spring break even though all I've done is work so far. While at work I made three people ridiculously happy and I got some awesome news that involves a one year pin and becoming a "regular" EEEKKKKKK THIS IS SO AWESOME !! In your best Rapunzel Voice: "THIS JA SO MUCH FUNNNNN!!! BEST DAY EVER!"

Climbing All Around

Today was full of sisterhood bonding activities and exploring canyons in Georgia! Even though my team didn't win  the sorority Olympics today was still tons and tons of fun! There was plenty of physical exertion and laughter as well as singing. Have I mentioned the copious amounts of pictures? No? 

Well, pictures are a fairly common thing in my sorority. Every retreat we take group pictures and class pictures and individual pictures. Of course there are the pictures that are snapped during events and the candids as well as all of the pictures every individual sister or Nu took of each other/ the canyon. 

Overall it was a successful, final sisterhood retreat and I am glad to have had the opportunity to visit Alabama and Georgia. Now to get back to school and choreography and preparing for real life.

Sorority Girl Life

I Know a Girl...
"If know a girl...
Who is amazing.
She runs a few miles a day, aces her classes,
organizes social events, and participates in all sorts of campus organizations.
At night she may go out and have fun, but she always manages to get everything done.

I know a girl...
Who will let you cry on her shoulder and will be there for you in times of need.
She has lots of friends and makes sure she leaves enough time to hang with them all.
She will give good advice and listen to your every word and thought with an unbiased ear.
She will love you for who you are and accept you no matter what.

I know a girl...
Who will smile even though she didn't have the greatest day.
She always brings her positive attitude and it's contagious.
Those who are around her want to smile too!

I know a girl...
Who will bring out the best in everyone she meets.
She has friends in many different houses on this campus as well as friends who are not Greek, because she does not care what house you're in.
Who parties it up at fraternity parties, but goes many other places at night.

You might know this girl too...
Whether you're in her house or not, everyone knows one of these girls.
She is my sister.
She might be your sister, or she might be someone else's.
Those that know this girl know what sororities are all about because she represents them in almost everything she does."

I know that I have mentioned my sorority multiple times in my posts but I don't think I've ever posted about my sorority. Obviously I'm in one and we are fairly small. Our smallness however is probably one of our best assists. Not having five bajillion girls to get to know is a real benefit when it comes to my sorority. We are tight knit and have really close friendships throughout our group.
Especially in my family which I am so ridiculously proud of! I love my big and all of my (many) littles and my wonderful cousin Catherine (who has foreveryoneshappiness.blogspot.com) and of course the rest of them as well! Well last night and this morning were kind of a big day for both the established sisters and the new girls. Big/Little lists were sent in and pairs were established. Soon all of the new girls will know who her big is and  what family she's in! 
It's so exciting!!! So for today's post I want to share the poem above and the picture I made as well as some advice about bigs, littles, and sisters in general. Your big is supposed to be your guiding force in the sorority. Someone who you can trust with your problems and just be yourself around without worries. Your little is someone you must be prepared to mentor and have fun with! She is your friend and someone you should always be there for. You sisters are you backbone, you support system. These are the girls that are going to be in many of you college memories and who a few of will be involved with the rest of your life. 
While this comes early in the semester , I feel that now is as good of a time as every o acknowledge that this was y last rush, my last hayride, and will be my last semester as a sister. So to my sisters, thank you for two wonderful years of laughter, support, and many fun times. I thank my big for being absolutely perfect and understanding and the salt to my pepper. I love you and I can't wait to see you again soon!! To ALL of my extraordinarily PERFECT littles, it's been my pleasure and an absolute honor to have been able to help each of you find your place in our little home away from home as well as having been a part of your college experience in anyway. And to all of the Nu's, I hope you have just as awesome of an experience as I have with these girls. I can't wait to visit you all later on! 


SIDENOTE: yesterday's post was actually day 38... Today is day 39!

Go the Distance

"I will beat the odds! I can go the distance! I will face the world! Fearless, proud, and strong!" Go the Distance- Hercules-1997

I really enjoyed today and how productive I was. I went to class, answered emails, made multiple phone calls, applied for graduation, and then worked on some things for my sorority. I am very happy with today's accomplishments. Days like today give me the confidence and motivation that I need to continue forward and hopefully enjoy the choices I've am regarding my future. I like feeling this way and setting myself up for success. I hope that once my internship starts next week  success and productivity will continue to be this easy to come by.

Also!!! Today I walked around campus without my crutches for the first time! It wasn't easy and my foot and leg are not happy with me but it is a step that I will need to take more and more often. Normalcy is in the near future... I can go the distance! 

Keep Moving Forward

The second day back to school consisted of waking up at 8 in the morning to do nothing. Most Tuesdays and Thursdays I will probably be working at my internship of working on homework but for as of today I had nothing to do. Now had my foot been functioning and not angry at me for walking around camous all day yesteday then I would have tried to go to the gym or do something productive. Alas, I spent the day napping, watching Disney movies, try to stay warm, and planning for my future. I've been looking into other options and making backup plans in case I don't get in to grad school or in case I end up in grad school and realize that the program I've put myself into is not the one I actually want to be a part of. 

I saw the quote above months ago and I've had it easily accessible at all times ever since. Disney's outlook on life seems to be pretty whimiscal and is just one of those things that makes me want to be better person. I want to try new things and keep moving forward, that just seems like it is the better plan in my opinion.  Today I tried to apply that by looking into options for my future and looking at what is in store for me for my final semester. 

Let's just say I feel like it is going to be good year.